54 35TH ANNUAL CRIME PREVENTION GUIDE www.stopfamilyviolence.pe.ca Common Concerns Points to Consider It’s really none of my business. It could be a matter of life and death. Violence in the community is everyone’s business. I don’t know what to say. Say “I care”, “I believe you” and “It’s not your fault”. Showing you are concerned is a good start. I might make it worse. Doing nothing could make things worse ‐ abuse often gets worse over time. It’s not serious enough to involve police. Police are trained to respond ‐ and even if the behaviour is not criminal, they know about other resources to help families experiencing abuse. I’m afraid the abuser might turn violent with me or my family if I interfere. Speak to the victim alone. Let the police know if you receive threats. Be sure to report it if you know there are weapons available. I don’t think the person really wants to leave because she or he keeps coming back. Maybe she or he did not have the support needed to overcome obstacles ‐ no money, no place to live, no babysitter, no transportation, unable to communicate, etc. I’m afraid she or he will be angry with me. Maybe she or he will. But the person will also know that she or he can turn to you when ready. They are both my friends. If one friend is being abused and living in fear, you can help by being supportive. I should wait until she or he asks for help. She or he may be too afraid and ashamed to ask for help. If the abuser wanted help or wanted to stop his or her behaviour, he or she would. He or she may be too ashamed to ask for help. What happens in the privacy of the home is a family matter. It isn’t when someone is being hurt ‐ it’s wrong and it’s against the law. You can help prevent and respond to abuse I’d like to help but I don’t want to interfere in a family or personal situation. If you are not sure about offering help to someone you think is experiencing abuse, consider these points:
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